Top 3 Things I Hate About Strider
Most of the jumping around is great. I often make cartwheels in the air when I jump also. Making a tight landing is a great feeling and needed in most boss fights. Overall its fine. But then there is the wall jumping. Strider can only jump at an angle when hanging. This makes for some infuriating pieces. You know you have to walk off the edge of the platform, hang, then jump to the next one. But does Strider do that? Nope. Instead he ends up pacing on the edge like a Grandmaster flash song. Google it. Then when you finally position yourself on the side of the platform, you must make the death defying jump… And we missed it. The angle was off again and again. I know, just slow down and take my time. Screw that. I’m a speedy ninja guy with an plasma sword. Turn down for what!?
2. Boss Fights
Don’t get me wrong. As an old school gamer, I love boss fights. They were the best. We all have our own top 10 boss fights. And Strider has its fair share of big baddies. Problem is, they are way too easy. They’re about as challenging as multiple turrets. And it sucks cause they all look great. Solo the bounty hunter should’ve put up a better fight. There is a good chance you will not die once during most these fights. And what good is a boss if he or she isn’t out for blood? I fell asleep so many times during these battles that I thought I was playing Diablo 3 again. But I wasn’t cause I uninstalled it ages ago. Take your too late patch and shove it up your ass, Blizzard.
I get it. Its 2014 and we all about that new new. Schwarzenegger was a politician turned failed movie star, the Xbox was your first console, and all the kids are on Miley. Or Molly, whatever. And with the times, styles change. I admit the hipster ruined the scarf. Living in Boston right next to Harvard square, I use to see it all the time. But that does not mean you mess with Strider’s signature scarf. But, “It is still there”, you say. No its not. All I see is a digital red rag wrapped around Strider’s face. Even the belt is too big. You have the waist size of a Victory Secret model yet throw on a belt found only at Big and Tall stores? Strider is all over the place and it concerns me greatly. We need to fix this before a sequel and we are starting that damn scarf. #StriderScarf